Coffee, Shoes, and Ramblings

“You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.”

–From Desiderata by Max Ermann

This sums up the last year perfectly. Things are exactly as they should be.

Just in time for the new year, a new time-consuming, tell-all meme Only 40 questions, but it requires a bit of thought so maybe all you “I don’t have anything to bloggers will get with it so I can read private intimate details of your life.

1. What did you do in 2006 that you’d never done before?
   • Quit a really good job that was driving me crazy to take a chance on another one.
   • Lived alone
   • Started a blog
   • Something I’m not telling
2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
   All but one, improve my reading list, only read two of the 12 books I planned to read. Yes I’ll make more.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
   Not immediate family, but some really good friends who were trying for five years to get pregnant finally did. The baby is due in the spring.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
   My grandmother, and some friend’s relatives.
5. What countries did you visit?
   Stayed in the states this year.
6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?

o         

1. • • A roommate
     • A job in the city I live in
     • That special someone special
2. What date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory?
   • Sometime in March
3. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
   Realizing I’m going to survive regardless of circumstances or not getting what I think I want. Realizing I have people who love me despite my imperfections.
4. What was your biggest failure?
   I don’t look at it as failure, failure only happens if you give up, I’m still trying.
5. Did you suffer illness or injury?
   Just some colds/allergies.
6. What was the best thing you bought?
   The purple couch.
7. Whose behavior merited celebration?
   My children continue to amaze me with their beauty, maturity and ability to love. Sara’s making the best of a long crazy summer and her ability to remain calm in the eye of the storm.
8. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
   Some people who were not what I thought they were.
9. Where did most of your money go?
   Food and shelter, clothes, gas, coffee and shoes.
10. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
    • Two very good canoe trips
    • New friends and getting closer to old friends
    • Singing and dancing
    • A new job
    • Gulf Wars
    • Coffee
    • Shoes
    • The purple couch
    • Love
    • Blogging
    • Gatlinburg
    • Hiking
11. What song/album will always remind you of 2006?
    More than one:

• I Ain’t Saying She’s a Gold Digger
• o O Come, O Come, Emmanuel
• o It’s Raining Men
• o Somebody’s Knockin
• o Kiss Me Quick Before I Die
• o McArthur Park

1. Compared to this time last year, are you:

1. happier or sadder? happier

2. thinner or fatter? thinner

3. richer or poorer? richer, in oh so many ways

1.  What do you wish you’d done more of?

• Cleaning house
• Talking to Jeremy
• Reading/writing
• Working out

• 1. 
     What do you wish you’d done less of?

regretting/ sitting on my butt/ whining/eating chocolate/procrastinating

20.  How will you be spending New Years? With friends.

21.  Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
Sara/Amber/Steve

22.  Did you fall in love in 2006?
Yes

23.  How many one night stands in this last year?
None, that’s not a phrase in my vocabulary.

24.  What was your favorite TV program?
My Boys, Eureka, Men in Trees

25.  Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No, I’m not wasting energy on that emotion.

26.  What was the best book(s) you read?
I actually liked the Penis book once I got into it. Also, Janet Evonavitch books and Jennifer Cruise books, of course Pride and Prejudice and The Master of All Desires, one of my Christmas books.

27.  What was your greatest musical discovery?
Pandora

28.  What did you want and get?
The ability to see past the situation and love the person behind it. The ability to not worry about outcomes. (peace)

29.  What did you want and not get?

o Another trip to Gatlinburg.

o Mr. I thought he was Right

o A specific job with a specific company who shall remain nameless.

30.    What were your favorite films of this year?
I didn’t see many. Nothing specific stands out.

31.    What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Nothing special was home alone due to the day it fell on. Didn’t have cake, it kind of didn’t happen this year. Had birthday dinner on another day and the dessert I wanted for birthday was not available. (really funny, you had to be there it was the dessert the place is known for) How old was I? Not sure, it varies, but the wisdom that comes with it was valuable.

32.    What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I always hate the questions that make it seem like ONE thing could make that big a difference. The one thing would be a more intellectually satisfying job with better pay and a travel package.

33.    How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
I’ve ceased caring what you think, I’ll dress to please me.

34.    What kept you sane?
Coffee, friends and sisters who listen to me and don’t judge me when I’m having the whiny moments and the knowledge that nothing stays the same.

35.    Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Fancy in the romantic sense? Matthew McConaughey

36.    What political issue stirred you the most?
Locally people not following rules already on books.

37.    Who did you miss?
Jeremy, Isaac, Margie and some others who don’t live close

38.    Who was the best new person you met?
I met a lot of new friends this year. I’m not naming favorites cause I’m happy with them all.

39.    Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.
Gee, not sure if it was a new life lesson. “Focus on the positive, give love, do the right thing no matter what it costs and joy will follow.”

40.    Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?
Again: no one song can sum up an entire year.

“This time it’s all here
You failed so long ago
And what can you do about it?
Stop your crying
What will He ask you?
Now that it’s over with
Behind that face there’s only hope in you
Do you have to feel this way?
‘Cause you never stay the same
Do you notice how you change when you believe?
Do you search but never find?
‘Cause this happens all the time
Do you notice how you change when you believe?
Just like I said before
Behind that face of yours
You hide so far away
From everything that’s right
I’m so glad you’re honest
But your life is such a mess
I know inside of you there’s hope
You’ll find it
And this life is all we are
So prepare your lonely heart
And you know it’s all you have
So breathe in
So say you’re sorry now
This pain won’t allow
And you know it’s all you have to do now”

Or:

“It’s raining men
Hallelujah it’s raining men, Amen
I’m gonna go out
I’m gonna let myself get
Absolutely soaking wet

It’s raining men
Hallelujah it’s raining men
Every specimen
Tall blond dark and mean
Rough and tough and strong and lean”

Or:

“I’m an angel bored like hell
and you’re a devil meaning well”

Here’s to peace, equality and hope in 2007

To the person who stole the look of my blog, the almost name and tried to be really cute about posting stuff. Grow the ^%$# up. I have reported you.

Don’t call me, don’t e-mail me, don’t come to my house. Don’t leave comments on my blog.

Do seek the medical attention you so  desperately need.

Ok, 2006 kind of started off stinky, mostly, death, dieing, not just of people but of dreams.

I propose for 2007 we have a great year.

To start it off? I’m going to two of the four parties I’ve been invited to. I’d go to the other two but its hard to bend time and space. One of the ones I can’t go to involves some serious wishing/hoping/planning and dreaming.

But my big news this year is I’m getting a new job! Where? who knows. I’m hoping at a certain place walking distance from my house, if not I’m going to have to pack and move. I like my house, I like my friends here and I like my yard mostly.

New Years Goals (not resolutions, Goals)

• Stop leaving coffee cups all over the house.
• Go to gym six days a week.
• Throw away half the junk I’ve accumulated.
•  Flirt more.
• Finish two writing projects
• Get a non sucky job (may have to go through a sucky job first)
• Run in a race
• Read some mentally challenging books
• Get authorized to fight
• Hike two new trails

The difference between a resolution and a goal? Goals have measurable time frames and you have steps in place to complete them.

Most of all, I hope your New Year is filled with as much hope and promise as it can hold.

And I’ll get to those eventually. But since I always have goals I’m working on you get this:

 These are a few of my favorite things. (and why yes it did start off as a perfume list for the alchemy store.)

•   patchouli (shut up already I LIKE IT)
• sandalwood
• pear
• lemon
• lime
• soft musk
• vanilla
• lavender
• cinnamon
• pumpkin food, smell, drink, coffee, anything
• clean baby
• puppies
• chocolate
• laughing
• people who make me laugh
• nice people
• sweet boys
• a new challenge
• a good “discussion”
• saying I’m happy for you
• saying I’m sorry and being forgiven
• babies who smile at you in the store
• cookies
• coming home
• road trips
• fall leaves
• spring rain
•  
• Chit chat in the elevator
• people saying, I’m sorry, I’m in public and can’t talk on my cell phone.
• Snow
• hot tubs
• sandy beaches
• pop cycles
• peanut butter and honey
• chocolate
• dreaming
• waking up
• someone else made the coffee
• candlelight
• new shoes

Have new reading books, cookbooks, and running and hiking socks. It was a good Christmas. Also a chef’s knife, an interesting vase I’m not sure what to do with yet, and some other odds and ends. It took several hours at my family’s to get to the “I’ve had enough and I’m leaving” stage. All in all, not a bad holiday. I’m the least stressed I’ve been for the holidays in years. All I need is a good massage and I’ll be worthless.

   pst, hey! wanna be a reference? I’m still interviewing, oh joy. I have accepted a longterm (2-3 months) temp job that starts Jan 2, providing I’m able to come to work.

 I have also been offered a job, with an excellent very wonderful boss, but alas, very bad pay. (like several hundred a month LESS than I make now) I could do both and not have a life if it comes to that.

 A list of things I’d have to give up:

 cable

internet

gym

dance class

groceries

restaurants, (currently maybe twice a week)

home phone

clothes

books

travel

 I’m just not seeing that working out too well for me.

 I’m hoping for the job I really want which is close to home, planning for a cross country move if that doesn’t pan out. I don’t like to move, it makes me want to crawl up in a tiny ball and stay there. On the other hand if I took the job with bad pay, I’d have to give up a lot of things, like eating. There just wouldn’t be money in the budget for that. Also, I could kiss ever retiring goodbye.

 So I’m still applying, and throwing things away in anticipation of a move. Either way, change is on the wind.

You hear it everywhere and see it in all the ads. “Christmas is for Families” So what does that mean for those of us who are single? For those who don’t have kids, spouse or other birth family members near? Is Christmas not for us? I was wondering about this a lot the last week. You’d think Madison Avenue would wise up and show some non-traditional families having a very Merry Christmas. Not all families are a unit of happy mom, dad and kid or kids.

I started to blog about it earlier this week, but kept milling it over in my head. I didn’t put up a tree this year because everytime I was going to something came up, a funeral, a special mission for a loved one, and this, that, and the other. I thought about the possibility that I may be moving shortly and how neatly all the Christmas stuff is packed away and just decided to leave it packed. I do have a Menorah, and a few Christmasy things that stay out all year round, so its not that I’m scrooging, its just J won’t be here and I’m leaving tonight for family and I just didn’t want to. And if Christmas really is in your heart, why the need to decorate? I’m very happy, rested, relaxed, thanks to not working at a place that this is the busiest time of the year. The 12 hour days seven days a week aren’t happening this year. Yesterday I went to shop for fun cause the shopping is done. I went to the gym, worked out swam, sat in the whirlpool and took a nap in the sauna. It’s a very good Christmas.

Today our church had a candelight church service and family communion. Families went up family by family and took communion together. I went with a group that I go to church with, nine of us, one married couple, the rest single, and one son just home from bootcamp still with a fresh haircut and wearing dress uniform. They are part of my family.

The people sitting behind us were having this conversation, “I’m not going to walk up there, you all go on ahead.” Yes, you are, I’ll hold your arm.” “No I’m not, I can’t see today, this is the worst it’s ever been, I’m afraid I’ll stumble and fall.” No, You won’t fall, I’m going to walk with you.” And there they went, five ladies, who looked in their 80s, dressed in their Christmas best, and in their midst, the lady who can’t see, lovelingly helped to walk by her friends. I watched them pray and take communion and knew that they were a family. Maybe not the family you see on TV and in a thousand different versions of Christmas movie, but a family none the less. After all, what is a family if it isn’t a group of people who love each other, are there in good times and bad and who help each other when they can’t see the truth and line them out when they are walking the wrong way?

The hope and the love that is Christmas is for everyone, and I wish you the hope for a brighter future and a better world.

Yep, that’s right, the Joy of Christmas will steal upon you and take you unawares.

Be it the toddler who gets a Christmas present early and walks around saying “arrghhh” so quietly you aren’t sure what he said. And then telling you his name is Pirate.

Or the toddler named Lily who was wearing a tutu bathing suit and stole my crummy mood. Or maybe the sauna did. I was laying in there trying to make my cold go away and she was peaking in the glass door. Its hard to be crabby with all that cuteness before you.

After that, I was singing in the grocery store (quietly, I don’t want to be hauled away) and the people for the most part wernt’ frantic yet.

Public Service announcements:

For Lowes: Green is a color not the lack of treatment for wood. Untreated means not treated. Knowing this will make everyone’s day go smoother.

For Bath and Body Works: Putting the expiration’s clearly visible on your coupons will make your store more money. If a person looks, oh say, 4-5 times and doesn’t see an expiration date, they will assume they can save the coupons for holiday shopping. This simple courtesy would have made you at least $50 possibly $100 more this season, since I like to get several gifts at one time. As it stands, since this is the second time this has happened this year, I’m rethinking the whole Bath and Body works shopping at all.

For Sonic: Your advertisments are almost as bad as your food. Rethink both.

For Amazon: Thank you you rock.

For people with colds: You are already having trouble breathing, its probably NOT a good idea to try on a perfume sample.

For the people on cell phones. Green means go, it is a color yes, but it means say goodby and drive.

How well do you have to know people before this is an appropriate gift?

That’s what I thought too, and since the Southern Girls Guide to Gift Giving didn’t say different, I got them something else instead.

Other Tthings I’m helping Santa shop for, some for me, some for others:

A non-crummy job that pays more than I make now

A digital camera

A boyfriend (just one really good one)

If that’s too much trouble, a GI Joe Action figure, life size.

A laptop

A printer

Coffee

Plane tickets

A maid

A patio

Hardwood floors

A coffee pot

A canoe

Paddles

Peace on Earth

Cookies

A phone that doesn’t stink

An MP3 player

Tacky t-shirts

A mini dachshund puppy

Some books

Apparently whining pays off. I have a job offer for a temporary (three
months) free lance thing and a job interview for a different job today.
Also, had a phone interview for a really interesting job yesterday and one today.
The yesterday one was  the first one that really made me sit up and take notice. I know you have to work, but I like to do something interesting at the same time. To
get paid for doing something I enjoy.

I told someone about the interesting job possibility and they said, “Oh yes
but you will have the expense of moving.” Compared to the expense of not
having a job and not getting my bills paid, I think I can handle the cost of
moving. In fact it might be fun. Might stink, but there you go.

Found out about another job possibility today as well.

So I guess when it rains it pours.

Stop licking the floor that is disgusting.

WHAT is that smell?

Stop jumping on …(name the person)

Sit!

Come on, Come on, Come on

Cookies!

Be still or I’ll wop you.

Oh man, you stink!

Come here!

You are the world’s cutest dog!

Stop gnawing on that! (a body part)

Hey Fluffy!

Get in here Now!

(from strangers)

Oh how cute!!!

How old is she?

How sweet!

(from friends)

Why do you think I like you?

You are a tree rat

You only think you are cute

You are the world’s dumbest dog.